When being nice goes too far

byKimberly Faye

This morning I was listening to the Steve Harvey Morning show with my boyfriend. There is a segment on the show called "Strawberry Letter 23" where listeners write in and get relationship advice from Steve and Shirley. Well this morning there was an interesting letter.
The letter:
Date: 05/11/2009
Subject: Did I Miss It Or What?

Hi Steve and Shirley, My husband, daughter and I went out to dinner a few nights ago. To set the scene Steve and Shirley, we were at one table and directly behind us was a table with about 8 men (black and white). As I was walking toward the buffet line, one of the gentlemen from that table passed me and said hello (thats it). Being the person that I am, I said hello and continued to walk(thought nothing of it). When I got back to the table, my husband flipped. He started saying things like the guy was disrespecting him and smiling with his boys. Well, I saw none of this because I kept walking after speaking (I was only being polite). I told my husband that I did not have a problem with the way he felt (being disrespected), but I did have a problem with him embarrassing me (he kept being loud until I got up and went to the car). He feels he did nothing wrong and feels that I am defending this man because of how angry I got over the whole thing. To be honest he should have received that as a complement, he had something this other man found attractive. Steve and Shirley am I wrong for getting upset? Did I Miss It or What?

Like Steve said this morning men and women think differently from each other, while a women think its harmful. The man feel's disrespected. This got me and my boyfriend talking, because we have been in a similar situation, where we were at a party. Anyhow, my boyfriend texted me about it while I was at work; here is what he said:
"Steve Harvey is so right. he just blasted the woman for getting mad. She should know that men don't want hot girls so that other men can flirt with them. Men don't need verification from other men that their girls are hot. She shouldn't have said Hi to him. I've noticed at parities or clubs or even on the street that often girls who are with their boyfriends don't even loot at me, because they want to avoid any problems. Then if they're introduced to me they turn out to be very nice girls."

I definitely have mixed feelings about that. If a guy knows you are with your boyfriend, men need to respect that. Women need to respect their men if they know a guy a flirting with them. BUT on the other hand, how are women suppose to know the little tricks and maneuvers guys pull on women that is considered flirting. Another thing about the "hot girlfriend" factor. Men aren't going to bring a busted girl/girlfriend to a show/mall/club/party etc... around guys cause they want other guys to know they can pull a beautiful woman. But I definitely respect the way men feel, because they know what other guys think about, because they are a guy.lol. But women are the same way we know the little things women to to try to flirt on the low when you are with your boyfriends, but the guy just think they are being nice. I feel that if you are confident in your mate you will not feel threatened if another guy thinks your wife/gf is hot. She can't help it, and vice versa. We just all need to learn to respect each other, and know our limits.

What do you think?